An open letter to young girls and women everywhere

Posted on October 8, 2016October 9, 2016 by alexb2448

This vintage typwriter is our featured image.

Dear Sisters,

I am writing to you as someone who is finally comfortable in her own skin.

It has been a long and difficult journey.

From what I’ve been told (and what I remember) I was a precocious little girl, with a vivid imagination and a flair for the dramatic. But as a little girl and teenager, I also experienced verbal and emotional abuse. At home, my father constantly put me down. At school, my classmates bullied me.

Founder/owner of In Brief Legal Writing Services, Alexandra Bogdanovic. Photo by N. Bogdanovic

I suppose I was an easy target. I was always a little bit overweight. I had eczema and asthma. I wore a patch and/or glasses to correct my “lazy” eyes. I wasn’t athletic. I wasn’t stupid, but I was never the smartest kid in class. I wasn’t a gifted musician or a dancer or an artist… The things that seemed to come so easily to other kids were always harder for me

I lacked self-confidence and experienced low self-esteem. I was afraid of being laughed at and I was afraid to fail. I am sure some of you can relate.

In high school, things finally changed for the better. A teacher helped me discover a hidden talent. I discovered that I could write. My confidence blossomed. But it was fragile. And I was still young.

In the ensuing years came the joys and sorrows of college, college romance, entry into “the real world,” engagement, marriage and divorce. At 30, I moved back “home” to recover from the bitter blow that ended my marriage to the man I planned on being with forever. At 34, I moved to Virginia for a new job and a much-needed change of scenery.

Alone in a new place, I made my share of mistakes. I trusted the wrong people. I misjudged alleged friends. After eight-and-a-half years, I lost my job. But by the time I returned home for the second time, I’d written a book — and I’d found myself.

Today I am hardly perfect. But I am happy being me. Finally.

And if there’s anything I hope you can learn from my story, it is the following:

Each of you is unique.
Each of you matters.
Each of you deserves to be loved.
Each of you deserves respect.
Each of you has something meaningful to share with the rest of the world.

Ultimately your worth is defined not by your physical appearance, but by the choices you make and the values you hold. You can allow others to govern your emotions, or you can take control of them yourself. You can live up to other people’s expectations or set your own. You can measure your beauty by “conventional” and societal standards, or ignore them and live by your own. You can measure your success by your material possessions or by the difference you’ve made. You can let the world beat you down. Or you can summon the courage to hold your head up high. No matter what.

It’s all up to you.

Love,

Alexandra

Author’s note: The preceding was written in response to recent news accounts about U.S. presidential candidate Donald J. Trump’s lewd, sexist and misogynist comments caught on tape in 2005.

Why I haven’t I created a Facebook page for In Brief Legal Writing Services — yet

Posted on October 3, 2016 by alexb2448

As a new business owner, I’ve had a lot to do over the past year.

I created this website, and began blogging regularly. I opened a Twitter account. I have a (minimal) presence on Google+. I am building a client base through Upwork.com.

The only thing I haven’t done is start a Facebook page. Some people — including “the experts– (whoever they are) say it’s the single most important thing all new business owners should do. “They” are probably right (whoever “they” are).

So why haven’t I done it? Why wasn’t it my first priority?

Call me a rebel. Call me an individualist. Call me a big fan of critical thinking. Call me stubborn. Call me obstinate. Call me pig-headed. Call me an idiot. Call me anything you’d like.

It won’t change how I feel about Facebook. I hate it. I always have — and I always will.

I hate it because I value my privacy. I hate it because it seems inane. I hate it because “everyone” participates — although I must confess, I don’t know who “everyone” is.

I hate Facebook because I had to post stories (or links to stories) there when I worked at various newspapers. It was time-consuming and it was a pain in the butt — to put it nicely.

I hate Facebook so much that I never created a page to promote my book, Truth Be Told: Adam Becomes Audrey, even though “everybody” insisted that I should. I suppose “everyone” will say that I would have sold more books if I had started a Facebook page to promote my memoir. But here’s a newsflash: I don’t really care.

All of that being stated, I suppose I will have to put my personal feelings aside sooner or later. After all, this is about business.

So yes, I am planning on creating a Facebook page for In Brief Legal Writing Services. I’m determined to do it by the end of the year. And when I do, I hope to see you there.

Scams, schemes, lies and a lawsuit of epic proportions

Posted on September 16, 2016 by alexb2448

At this point I’m not sure who I’ll sue. But I’m going to sue someone. I may even sue a whole bunch of people. And if I have my way, it will be a lawsuit of epic proportions.

But then again, I’m getting a bit ahead of myself. So let me start from the beginning.

To start with, I don’t want to be sued myself. So I can’t name the parties involved in this case. Let’s just call them Company X, Company Y and Company Z.

As I may have mentioned in a prior post, we enlisted the services of Company X in connection with our kitchen renovations earlier this summer. Because Company X is an international conglomeration with a very good reputation, we were confident the project would be completed promptly, on budget and to our satisfaction.

Little did we know…

At any rate, Company X referred us to Company Y, which we paid for general contracting services. We also paid sub-contractors to do the rough plumbing and electrical work, which all went according to plan. We were totally happy… until we phoned the Town Hall to see when the inspections for the rough plumbing and electrical had been scheduled — and found out they weren’t.

So we reached out to Company Y to see what was going on. Phone calls went unanswered. E-mails weren’t returned. A dumpster partially filled with construction debris sat in our driveway.

This went on for weeks.

Finally, we heard from one of our sub-contractors, who called for an update. Without going into too many details, he told us that there was some huge kerfuffle with Company Y — and that we should go ahead and schedule the inspections for the completed work ourselves. So we did.

The inspections went smoothly, but we still couldn’t get a hold of anyone from Company Y. So we got in touch with Company X and they referred us to Company Z. Company Z gave us detailed information about Company Y, and suggested we take legal action against them. Company Z also promised to “make things right” and help us get our project back on schedule.

A week or so after our initial conversation with someone from Company Z, another representative came to meet us in person and assess the status of our project. Based on that conversation, we thought everything would be okay. That was a month ago.

Fast forward to today, when we finally called our attorney to schedule a time to talk about this and then called Company Y to let them know what we’d done. Much to our surprise, someone from Company Y called us back — and told us everything we’d heard from Company Z is a pack of lies.

So we’ll meet with the representative from Company Y next week.

In the meantime, the project that started in June and was supposed to take six to eight weeks is still on hold.

And it’s almost October…

Here’s how to make America great again

Posted on September 12, 2016September 12, 2016 by alexb2448

As a reporter working in the New York City suburbs 15 years ago, I spent months covering the aftermath of the Terrorist Attacks on the World Trade Center. In the ensuing years, I covered the somber ceremonies held on the anniversary of that horrific day.

Those ceremonies are held to remind us what we lost that day. They are held as a reminder of what we stand to lose if our vigilance wanes. Yet they are also held as a reminder of what we stand to gain.

Black and white photograph of Freedom Tower. Photo by Alexandra Bogdanovic — Freedom Tower. Photo by Alexandra Bogdanovic

You see, if we really want to “make America great again,” we cannot forget the most important lessons we learned on September 11, 2001:

Take nothing for granted.
Thank the people who keep us safe.
Tell the people in your life that you love them.
Take time to enjoy the “little things” in life; they are the most precious.
Make the most of every opportunity presented to you.
Know that you are stronger than you think, and that you are capable of more than you can possibly imagine.
Never underestimate the resiliency of the human spirit in general and your own in particular.
Never underestimate the human capacity for love.
Exercise compassion.
Know you are blessed and help those who are less fortunate.
Do not fear adversity; it will bring out the best in you.
Never surrender when confronted by hate.
Lead by example.

Comment moderation or censorship?

Posted on September 9, 2016September 8, 2016 by alexb2448

It’s been a year since I founded In Brief Legal Writing Services and 10 months since I launched this site.

Based on some advice I got in the WordPress class I took in preparation for launching inbrieflegalwriting.com last fall, I initially decided not to allow readers to comment on my blog posts. At the time, I thought it would make my life easier. I have since realized that was a mistake.

Or was it?

While I welcome audience participation, moderating reader comments is not something I particularly enjoy. For one thing, it is time-consuming, and as a small business owner, time is a luxury I don’t always have. Secondly, because I firmly believe in freedom of speech, it creates a moral dilemma.

On one hand, the ability to moderate the comments made in this forum is essential. After all, this is a business site. My personal and professional reputation is at stake.

So make no mistake about it. Foul language and views expressed in anything less than a civil and professional manner simply cannot and will not be tolerated. If you use inappropriate language, engage in name-calling or any other vitriol so often found on the Internet these days, your comment will be relegated to the trash bin without a second thought. In fact, that is exactly what happened to a comment someone made earlier this week.

I won’t name the individual who felt compelled to leave a crude, sick, twisted and vicious comment in response to an old post, Don’t You Dare Feel Sorry for Brock Turner. However, I will say that the gist of the response was that Turner’s victim deserved to be sexually assaulted behind a dumpster.

Well here’s a newsflash: No one deserves to be sexually assaulted and left behind a dumpster. No one.

But getting back to the topic at hand, everyone is entitled to their opinion. And since this is the United States of America, everyone is allowed to express it. As a rule, I frown on any kind of censorship and welcome differing views. I encourage you — my readers — to engage in fierce debate with me and with each other. All I ask is that you remember that this is a professional forum and comment accordingly.

To paraphrase the old saying, “If you don’t have anything constructive to say, don’t say anything at all.”

Happy Labor Day!

Posted on September 5, 2016 by alexb2448

Happy Labor Day!

Here in the good old United States of America, today marks the unofficial end of summer. For most of us, there will be no more backyard barbecues. No more trips to the beach, lake or mountains. No more trips to Europe or other far-flung destinations. Not until next year, anyhow.

For the kids it’s time to go back to school. For the rest of us it is time to get back to work.

Yes, work. That’s what today is really all about. According to the Department of Labor, Labor Day is “is a creation of the labor movement and is dedicated to the social and economic achievements of American workers.” Its history dates to the late 19th century when the groups initially formed to combat workplace exploitation wielded considerable influence.

As documented on history.com, New York City hosted the first Labor Day parade on September 5, 1882. On that day, “10,000 workers took unpaid time off to march from City Hall to Union Square.” The tradition continues to this day. In fact, the 2016 parade is happening as I write this.

But as I write, I am reflecting less on what is happening in New York City than on my own achievements. You see, I founded In Brief Legal Writing Services exactly one year ago this month. And while I don’t yet have the client base — or income — that I hoped to have by this point, I am happy with the way things are going.

I’ve had the opportunity to work with some really cool people. I’ve learned something new every day. Most importantly, I’ve enjoyed it. And as far as I’m concerned, the best is yet to come.

Eli The Cat for president?

Posted on August 31, 2016September 1, 2016 by alexb2448

Since I started my business and launched this site, I’ve made it a rule to refrain from discussing politics in this forum. It’s not that I fear voicing my opinion on controversial issues — just scroll through the archives and you will see that’s hardly the case. I just don’t think it’s appropriate.

But with Election Day looming — and two of the worst candidates in U.S. history seeking the single most important job in the world — I am officially diving head first into the cesspool otherwise known as presidential politics.

Eli, the In Brief Legal Writing Services mascot. — In Brief Legal Writing Services mascot Eli catching up on the latest news. Photo by Alexandra Bogdanovic

Unfortunately it’s too late to nominate my cat for president — but maybe I can organize a write-in campaign. Or maybe not.

But one thing’s for sure. It would definitely be worth a try… And no, I am not a crazy cat lady. There’s definitely a precedence for this.

According to a recent article on wthnh.com, a cat from Kentucky named Limberbutt McCubbins is “is officially registered to run as a democratic candidate for this year’s presidential race.” And apparently McCubbins has some competition — from a Louisiana crawfish named Crawfish B. Crawfish.

I kid you not. I couldn’t make this stuff up.

Apparently, at least five other animals of varying species have sought public office over the years. And some of the bids have been successful.

Maybe Eli will join them someday. Maybe he won’t. But in any case, I think he’s content with the titles he already holds. You see around here, Eli is also known Sir Sheds A Lot, slayer of mice and guardian of the realm.

It suits him.

This is (almost) enough to restore my faith in humanity

Posted on August 26, 2016 by alexb2448

A recent story about a Marshall, Virginia, boy’s generosity is almost enough to restore my faith in humanity. Almost.

As reported on fauquier.com, young Cody Glidden demonstrated unusual maturity and selflessness as he prepared to celebrated his 11th birthday this summer. Instead of asking for presents, he asked his friends and family to get gift cards for local eateries. And instead of keeping them, he decided to give them away.

Specifically, he donated them to Warrenton’s Finest.

But would prompt the young boy to collect the gift cards for the local police? Warrenton Police Chief Lou Battle wondered the same thing.

“That was a first,” Battle told the Fauquier Times. “It was a big, generous gesture. What kid that age would trade birthday presents for gift cards for police officers?”

To me, the answer is simple. A good kid. A kid who has already learned the importance of putting other people’s’ needs and feelings ahead of his own. A kid whose parents have done a fantastic job raising him.

“I just wanted them to know the people here appreciate them,” Cody told the newspaper. “I didn’t really expect anything, maybe just a thank you,” he said.

In return for his generosity, Cody got a tour of the Warrenton Police Department and some souvenirs. He also got to meet Battle and some Warrenton police officers when he and his father stopped by headquarters to drop off the gift cards.

Personally, I wish I’d still been there to cover this story. It was the kind of thing I loved to write about — and the kind of feel-good story that readers love to see.

Personally, I’d love to see more of these stories and less of the garbage that passes for “news” these days.

Who knows. If I do see more, it just might just fully restore my faith in humanity.

Drama, drama, drama…

Posted on August 8, 2016August 9, 2016 by alexb2448

As an old friend of mine used to say, “we all have choices.” So I guess there are a couple of different ways I can choose to reflect on the events of last week. I can look back at the first week of August 2016 as one of the most memorable weeks of my life — or as one of the most forgettable.

But the truth is, any way I choose to look at it, there was plenty of drama. And no, I didn’t create it.

As most of you know, the drama began when my cat, Eli, ended up at the vet. At first we weren’t sure what was wrong. We figured he might have had a really bad hair ball — but the vet who examined him said his back was extremely sensitive. An x-ray didn’t yield evidence of any sort of obstruction in Eli’s intestines, but we did learn that he has an extra vertebrae.

The drama continued when his medicine (including some anti-inflammatory pills and very potent pain killers) seemed to make Eli extremely timid and anti-social. He hid under the bed for four days, and only came out to use his litter box. He ate and drank from the bowls I put within reach, and stuck his head out far enough to be brushed, but that was about it.

Eli finally came out of hiding yesterday, but is now camped in the plant room in the basement. At least it’s quiet and cool down there. He’s got a litter box down there. He’ll eat and drink whatever I put down for him, and he’s being a lot more affectionate. Most importantly, no longer seems to be in any pain. So things are looking up…

But wait, there’s more…

Now if only we can get the situation with our kitchen renovation resolved. Due to a potential class action law suit (or other legal remedies) I can’t go into too much detail about this mess. Here’s what I can tell you. We put a kitchen addition on our house several years ago. The project got sidetracked due to unforeseen complications — but the work finally got started earlier this summer. Everything was going well… until our general contractor seemed to fall off the face of the earth.

As anyone who’s ever gone through significant renovations knows, that’s never good. To cut a long story short, last week we finally got a hold of someone who can help us resolve the situation. Of course, we haven’t heard from her since we spoke to her… so we will see what happens.

So much for a quiet weekend

So you would think that the drama would let up over the weekend. But no. Apparently that’s too much to ask.

Yesterday I had to call the cops. It wasn’t an emergency or anything. But let’s just say I wasn’t happy when I finished mowing the lawn, walked down to the river, and found an abandoned skiff tied to our landing. I had never seen this boat before. And there was no sign of the owner.

The most annoying thing — and the main reason I called the police — is that the only way to get from the landing (which is really a set of steps leading down to the water) to the street is to walk through our back yard. And I’m not really thrilled about the idea of someone I don’t know tramping across our property.

As it turned out, my concerns were merited. Let’s just say the owner is “known” to police. And let’s just say he’s not the type of guy anyone would want tramping through their yard…

Dallas Cowboys support for cops gets mad props from this NY Giants fan

Posted on August 3, 2016August 2, 2016 by alexb2448

In the interest of full disclosure, I am a New York Giants fan. A die-hard New York Giants fan. As such, I hate the Dallas Cowboys. Passionately.

I mean, come on. It shouldn’t come as a big shock. I’ve do have a cat named Eli, whom I adopted after Big Blue won the Super Bowl in 2008. Of course, he already had that name when I adopted him, but that’s beside the point.

In Brief Legal Writing Services owner Alexandra Bogdanovic's cat, Eli. — Eli under the Christmas Tree. Christmas 2013.

The point, as I initially said, is that I hate, cannot stand, and passionately dislike the Dallas Cowboys. And their fans.

But this week, the Dallas Cowboys did something really cool. It took guts. It showed class. And as far as I’m concerned, the Dallas Cowboys organization deserves mad props.

As the saying goes, actions speak louder than words. And as they opened training camp, the Dallas Cowboys showed their support for the Dallas police. According to Yahoo’s account (which frequently cited the Associated Press), here’s what happened:

“The team came out in waves. The first wave was led out by Cowboys owner Jerry Jones and some of his players, and Brown. Families of four of the five officers who were killed were represented at the practice, the Associated Press said.”

In addition to showing its support for the Dallas Police Department and the families of the law enforcement officers slain last month, the team wanted to send another message.

“Our players felt that there is no better example of what unity is — and can be about — than a sports team,” the Cowboys reportedly said in a statement. “And they felt they had the opportunity — for the first time they were together this year — to send this very important message.”

To reinforce that message, the Cowboys are sporting “arm-in-arm” decals on their helmets, according to Yahoo.

It is a timely and important message — and under the circumstances, I really shouldn’t make light of it. But I just can’t help it. So I’ll end by saying that as a New York Giants fan, I have no doubt that we will remain united in our universal dislike of the Dallas Cowboys and our hopes that we knock the snot out of them this season. In that, I am sure we are not alone.

Welcome

But wait, there’s more…

So much for a quiet weekend